Slightly Off the Mark

These Photos Are For Turkeys

It's been an incredible month--incredible sometimes meaning incredibly bad--so this is just a flyby photo post; I hope it won't be too much of a turkey.

The only time I ever saw turkeys as a kid was at Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners. That's because over-hunting and deforestation wiped them out in Indiana. (For which I plead innocent: Despite my name, I've never hunted. I have cut down a few trees, but never mind.)

But they're back!

I'm sure most of us consider that a good thing, but not necessarily.

You see, despite the famous WKRP In Cincinnati episode, it turns out turkeys can fly. Wild turkeys can, anyway, for up to a hundred yards at 55 miles an hour. I once saw a car come within a few feet of hitting a turkey flying across the road at windshield level, which would definitely have made a mark. I don't think that driver would have been happy with his catch.

The Indiana Department of Natural Resources brought turkeys back, and they arrived in northern Indiana during the 80s and 90s. These days you can find rafters of turkeys in all 92 Indiana counties. (That's the official name for a flock of turkeys. No, I don't know why.)

I took all of these photos in northern Indiana. Most, like the one above, came from Pokagon State Park or the area of Chain O' Lakes State Park. The near-collision I witnessed was about halfway between Kendallville and Avilla in Noble County.

The one above I tried to sharpen, but just made it look worse, and then I couldn't locate the original ... so I left the rest alone. (I mean I tried to sharpen the photo, not the meat carver.)

I also took most of them from near a road, or even from the car. As if deer weren't a danger enough! But I can tell you from experience that if you're on a trail and hear a turkey crashing through the underbrush, it sounds like you're on the wrong end of a Jurassic Park movie. My wife tells me armadillos are just as loud in the woods, and they're expanding in Indiana, too. At least they can't fly. Can they?

There are now some 125,000 wild turkeys in Indiana. But the Hoosier state is also a top producer of domestic turkeys--some 20 million turkeys are produced for consumption annually, just in this state. I hope the wild ones aren't planning a jailbreak--but I'll keep an eye on ham production, just in case.

Having all of our books could be a feather in your cap.

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Remember: Benjamin Franklin thought the turkey should be our national bird, but he also had a great library.

A Fire Department Block Party, and the Block Isn't Even On Fire

Music. Beer. Buff firemen. Well, some are buff, and we'd prefer to be called firefighters, 'cause it's the 21st Century.

Yes, the Albion Volunteer Fire Department is hosting its first block party, an event which, typically, involves having a party on a block. In this case it's the Noble County Courthouse Square, which is indeed a block. If you want to be specific, it's around the area of Main and York Streets, which--come to think of it--I can see from my part time job.

But I can't have beer on my part time job. Still, I'm betting there will be other beverages there, and besides, most of the people reading this don' t have my job. This is on a Saturday (September 12th), so there'll be plenty of parking in the courthouse square area, too. But if you plan to visit the beer tent, bring a designated parker.

This is where I usually post a link to the Facebook event page, but I can't get it to work properly because FB is dumb. Okay, I probably pushed the wrong button, but the AFD's page is here:

https://www.facebook.com/albionfd

The money raised goes toward, among other things, tools, fitness equipment, and training props. The fitness equipment part is pretty self-explanatory. Let me explain: When we started out in 1888, most members of the department had physical work that kept them in shape. There were butchers, bakers, candlestick makers ...

Well, our first fire chief was among other things a baker, and butchers would make sense--I don't know if we had any candlestick makers. Here is what I eventually determined is the first known photo of the Albion Volunteer Fire Department:

I had this photo for a few years before I realized the little frame building under construction on the right is, in fact, Albion's first firehouse. It took me awhile after that to figure out that the men marching in the white belts are some of the town's first volunteer firefighters, which dates this photo to late 1887. The women behind them? Probably the Ladies Auxiliary, or whatever it was called back then. Their job was to follow along and, if one of the men chickened out and tried to run from the fire, shame them into going on.

It's possible I'm making that last part up.

Back then I would probably have been a candlestick maker, working on my feet all day, walking from place to place, drilling with the fire guys to hand pump the engine, and having earwax problems. I don't know. Wouldn't candlestick makers have wax issues?

Now we need fitness equipment. These are the days of typing on keyboards, riding trucks instead of pulling engines, and drinking beer instead of well water. (We can't actually go to a fire if we've been drinking, which is the main reason why I never took up drinking.)

But when those fires break out, we still have to put on a zillion pounds of equipment and go running toward the flames.

Speaking of beer, there are also those training props we need to pay for. We used to find buildings due to be demolished, and train there on every aspect of firefighting, until it was time to let the place burn down completely. These days it's a lot harder to find a building we can legally beat up for training. The State of Indiana does help out on training resources, but there's the need for us to build our own doors and windows to force, roofs to ventilate, and 150 pound mannequins to haul around.

Should various government entities pay for our training needs? Sure, but in some cases they can't, and in others they won't. Besides, now we can have a block party.

So come over, have a beer, listen to music by Sweetwater All Stars Band, and bring the kids! Not for the beer. For them there'll be a "touch a truck", the fire prevention trailer, and no beer. Enjoy the local cuisine, which is a Greece word that originated in Turkey, meaning food. Oh, and if you wander over to the AFD's booth (let's fill that boot! With money. Duh.), you can buy a beverage Koozie to remember us buy. That might not seem like a big deal to you, but my dispatcher Koozies are getting ragged.

You can find our books, and my alleged humor, all over the interwebs:

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Remember: The one thing we’ll never let burn is books.

Welcoming a New Grandkid Into the World

Yes, my photo post is late. It's been ... a week. One of those weeks; details are most likely forthcoming. I considered not doing one this week at all, but then I was sent some photos I was happy to share.

Meet Silas Noah. He seems confused. Welcome to reality, Silas.

He would be my sixth grandchild, and ninth if you count the step-grandkids, which I do. That means I have as many grandkids as my father had siblings down in Kentucky, at a time when that was much more common.

I know everyone thinks their offspring is born beautiful, but we all know most babies come out red and wrinkly, and look a little bit like those aliens your crazy old uncle used to go on about. The exception would be my grandkids, who were all born beautiful.

You can tell we're related, because we both like to sleep. A lot.

His big brother had to make a lot of trips down to Riley Children's Hospital (he's fine now), but Silas (or will we end up calling him Noah?) is perfectly healthy. Sure, he might grow up to love Heavy Death Rap Metal--and that might be a thing, by then--but for now he's doing okay.