A book rollout rolls over, ice bucket challenges, and other tales of woe

Coming Attractions has had delays getting up in print and e-platforms other than Kindle, although it's coming soon. There was also a problem with an illness, the details of which I most definitely don't want to share (and I'm getting better).

But it is up on Kindle, and you can read a sample here:

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B07KM6JWQC

 These things happen. It's my fault for making premature announcements when I knew I was going on vacation--a virtual guarantee of illness or injury, or both. I went so far as to promise to post an embarrassing photo of me if we sold 100 copies in the first couple of weeks.

Well, it's been a couple of weeks.

I know many of you want to see me be embarrassed. So, in the hopes that we'll have everything set up in the next few days, I've extended that promise.

Never mind the question of whether an author should lure in readers by promising to make fun of himself. I spent years making fun of myself in my humor column--why stop now?

So if we sell a hundred copies of Coming Attractions by January 1st, I'll read one of my own poems online (and trust me, I'm bad at it). In addition, I'll share one or more truly embarrassing pictures of myself. We've been going through photos for a book project, and I've found one of me in my prom tux, and another that was even worse.

And if we make a thousand total sales of all our books between now and the end of the year, I'll do something even better. Or worse. I've been told the ice bucket challenge is so last winter, so if any of you have better ideas, I'm open for suggestion. Or I could just do a book giveaway? What do you think?

Sick (bath)room

And so we continue our family tradition of someone getting sick and/or injured during all my vacations. I’ve been ... inconvenienced ... for several hours, with what I was beginning to think was food poisoning. Emily points out that we’ve been eating the same food—she thinks it has to do with a big change in diet and sleep patterns over the last several days. 

Either way, I’ve missed an important meeting and haven’t done anything with our “Coming Attractions” rollout or our new book project all day. Emily and the dog are taking care of me, and although I still have a bellyache I’ve stopped sweating, and I’m getting some color back. Some more Powerade and crackers, and I’ll be good as ... well, I’ll be okay.

Coming Attractions Cover, or: I'd like to thank my editor/wife/cover designer/layout coordinator

NOTE: I already sent this out on the newsletter, but I'd like everyone to know about Emily's hard work on the Coming Attractions cover. Also--and I'll mention this a lot--it's already up on Amazon for Kindle, even in the UK, France, and Germany: 

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07KM6JWQC 


The first idea Emily and I had for a Coming Attractions book cover didn't work out, and I'm glad. That's because Emily came up with something better, which she excels at.

It's a romantic comedy, but I didn't want the overused Hot Guy/Beautiful Woman cover art. Since the story is about a fight to save a drive-in movie theater, I thought of using some actual photos I took of the Auburn-Garrett Drive-In, and maybe having either the marquee or the movie screen frame the title. But for the life of me I couldn't find the original, large version of those pictures. The too small copies are here:

It would have taken a bit of Photoshop magic, of course. But while I was rooting around for the photos, Emily came up with another idea that I ended up liking better, even though I actually brainstormed and outlined the story at the Auburn-Garrett.

As a refresher, here's what Coming Attractions is about:

In the darkness of an Indiana drive-in movie theater, Maddie McKinley returns from the concession stand, climbs into the wrong van, and gets tackled by the father of the kids inside. Logan Chandler is embarrassed about roughing her up, but also intrigued by the beautiful young woman from Boston, who arrived alone at the movies wearing an expensive dress. Unfortunately, he’s the local businessman leading a battle to save the drive-in from developers—and she’s the attorney sent to make sure it’s torn down.

And here's the final result, which you should be able to click on to make bigger:

What do you think? Interested in reading it in one format or another? (After all, I have to figure out how many print copies to order!)

Speak of the Devil: When Might The Pilgrims Riot On Black Friday?

Speak of the Devil: When Might The Pilgrims Riot On Black Friday?: Thanksgiving is tomorrow for you Yanks (we Canadians sensibly had it weeks ago), and so I have an image blog for the holidays... ...

Coming Attractions on Kindle!

If you haven't already heard, the Kindle version of Coming Attractions is available for pre-order! You can get all the details here:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07KM6JWQC?ref_=pe_3052080_276849420

Or you could just wait a few days, because it should be live on Black Friday--and available to order without fighting a crowd. Or you could wait a little while longer, when we'll have the print version up and hopefully other e-book versions, too.

If I get, oh, a hundred sales across all platforms by the end of the month, I'll ... I dunno, something. I'm making this up as I go along. Maybe read one of my poems live? Or post my high school graduation photo?

Or would those be less of a reward, and more of a punishment?

Oh, and here's an idea: If I make a thousand total sales of all our books between now and January 1st, I'll do that ice bucket challenge thing everyone used to talk about. Why? Well, because I've never made a thousand sales in a month, and it would be neat.

We're in hardcover, and I'm on Instagram

I have something in common with J.K. Rowling! We used to have a lot in common, in that she was once dirt poor and unknown as an author. Now the only thing we have in common is that there are hardcover versions of our books.

Well, one book, in my case.

I mentioned previously seeing it on Amazon and thinking, “WTH?” (It stands for what the heck, let it go.) The book is Images of America: Albion and Noble County, which I’ve talked about a lot lately, mostly because I want people to read it. A lot of people have, which is very cool, and some might be upset that I didn’t tell them there was a hardcover version available.

But in my defense, I didn’t know there was a hardcover version.

It just showed up on Amazon one day, along with the e-book and paperback versions. Oddly enough, the hardcover isn’t advertised on the website of my publisher, Arcadia Publishing. Being the suspicious sort, I took the easy route and just ordered a copy from Amazon myself. Hey, I support this author.

And sure enough, there it was.

One of our books. In hardcover.

I’m very proud. Unfortunately, the book came out a couple of years ago, and most of the people who might have bought it in hardcover probably have it in paperback. But still. It’s cool. And it makes me wonder, if we did a hardcover edition of our next photo book, how many people might choose that one.

Here's the Instagram post I made about this, because ... I don't know ... somebody might want to see me talk?

https://www.instagram.com/p/BqanJrAFjjf/

Still selling the No-Campfire soap

On Sunday the 18th The No-Campfire Girls is going up for the day on The Fussy Librarian, an e-book website that can be found here:

https://www.thefussylibrarian.com/

Like many small businesses (I'm a writer, but let's face it--I'm also a small business), I do more advertising this time of year because people are shopping for the holidays. Also, if you're anything like me, you're looking for something to do that involves not being outside. So, hey--books.

The No-Campfire Girls is listed as YA adventure, although I think it can be a lot of fun for adult readers too. Also, it's got firefighters, so there's that. It's just 99 cents on Kindle and $5 in paperback:

https://www.amazon.com/No-Campfire-Girls-Mark-Hunter-ebook/dp/B00K3OS35C/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1535180005

And of course it's on our website at www.markrhunter.com, just like all of our other books. Unless they're sold out, print copies are at the Noble Art Gallery in downtown Albion. I hope you'll consider supporting local businesses--and local authors--in your shopping this year. Unless you don't live near here, in which case I hope you support another locale's authors.

Fifteen year old Beth Hamlin is horrified to discover her beloved summer camp must go without campfires this year, due to the fire hazard from a drought. But Beth isn't one to just sit (or swim, or boat, or horseback) around. When her new cabinmate, Cassidy, claims a local Cherokee can do a rain dance, she jumps into action.

All they have to do is trick the Camp Director into letting Running Creek do the dance, avoid the local bully and a flying arrow or two, and keep from getting caught plotting with Cassidy’s firefighter father on a forbidden cell phone. With luck southern Indiana will get a nice, soaking rain, and Camp Inipi can have proper campfires again.

But when things go horribly wrong, the whole area is endangered by a double disaster. Now Beth and her unit may be the only people who can save not only their camp, but everyone in it.


*A portion of the proceeds of this book benefits Friends of Latonka, an organization made to save the Girl Scout summer camp at Wappapello, Missouri.

www.markrhunter.com

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Newsletter out with a fun suprise

New newsletter out today! I only put out about one a month, so for me it's a big deal ... although you'll likely see more than average over the next couple of months.

https://mailchi.mp/9a3e1ebbeac2/coming-attractions-cover-reveal?e=2b1e842057

Pulling The Horse Muscle, or Break In the Saddle Again

If you can see this video ... well, I'll be very surprised, because my video uploading skills are suspect, to say the least.


"Would you like to go on a trail ride?" my wife asked in August.

(Yeah, I know. It's taken me this long to recover from the emotional trauma enough to write about it.)

Do you remember those people on the tourist boat in Hawaii, who got hit by lava when the volcano exploded? It was like that. "Would you like to go on a boat ride? The view is great!" Oh, I'm sure they got an impressive view, indeed, especially during the medivac helicopter ride to the hospital.

This is Cheyenne. Cheyenne is ... shy. She tends to keep her head down in a good Eeyore impression.

 My wife, Emily, works at the Pokagon State Park saddle barn which, as you might imagine, is at Pokagon State Park, in northeast Indiana. It's one of those "they don't have to pay you as much because you love your job" kind of things, like being a radio DJ, or writing. One of her fringe benefits is that, if the hourly ride isn't sold out and there's a horse available, she can bring her husband along on a ride.

At no point while writing that policy did anyone consider whether the husband wanted to go.

I've been on about half a dozen trail rides now, so I'm better at it than when I began. The first time, my horse saw some nice grass off in the woods and wandered off, and they found me three days later, still unconscious from the tree limb. Okay, I exaggerate--slightly. The truth is, those horses wouldn't stray far from their routine trail even if you let them go.

But I hadn't been on a ride since early last year and ... how can I say this and still maintain my self-respect? Okay, there's no way: I'm out of shape. I haven't been trail hiking as much as usual due to writing chores, and the muscle stretches the chiropractor gave me to do only work, it turns out, if you actually do them.

That's Emily all the way up in front, in the hat. If she looks particularly alert right there, it's because we'd just seen a coyote standing in the trail ahead of us.

But that's no problem, because all you have to do is ride, right? You horse people, you're laughing right now. Well, first you have to get on the horse, which involves putting your foot into a stirrup, which is fine except the stirrup is at the level of your chest. I haven't been able to lift my foot to chest level since I was eighteen. Hah! Kidding--I couldn't then, either.

Then you have to swing your other foot over the horse which, I think, is when something happened. I didn't notice it at the time, because I was busy noticing how very high up above the ground I was. The words "head" and "melon" were intertwining in my mind right then.

On the first leg of our 45 minute trip, a coyote casually walked out onto the trail, right in front of us. He looked over our way, and I expected him to say, "Have you seen a road runner go by lately?" But what he actually said was, "If Mark Hunter falls off the horse, can I have him? I spent all my food money on an Acme brand anvil."

Well, that's the predator vibe I was getting from him, anyway.

The thing is, riding a horse involves an entirely different set of muscles compared to my favorite exercise, which is hiking, which is way closer to the ground. (Usually.) And no, you don't just sit: You have to kind of ... hug the horse with your legs, and keep a good posture, which I haven't done since ... well, ever. It makes you appreciate how fit porn actors must be.

It really was a nice ride, and beautiful scenery, except for when the horse ahead of me had to relieve himself.

I expected to be sore the next day. But as I climbed down after a scenic and uneventful ride, something felt ... off.

I'd pulled a horse riding muscle.

I didn't even know there was a thing. It's very low on your back, on each side, or maybe very high on your hip, or--let's face it, it's a butt muscle. I suspect it happened when I climbed on board, but at the time I was too terrified to notice. Yeah, I've done this six times now, but I've also seen all those YouTube videos entitled "Riding Gone Wrong".

Also, I once personally saw someone fall of a horse. They didn't get up fast.

But there was an upside. I'd been reading the second novel in George R.R. Martin's Game of Throne series, and those books are thicker than the Federal budget. Once the pain killers kicked in and I was settled on the couch, I got in some great reading time.

Maybe I'll even ride a horse again. Next year.