Slightly Off the Mark: Congratulations, Mr. President

(Before you read this, let me remind you that this is a humor blog. Just sayin'. No, I'm not going to debate over it; let's just have some fun.)

Let the recounts begin!

Okay, so as you read this election day voting hours are over, although the election itself might go on for weeks, months, or, as in the case of some Trump haters, the last one never stopped. But it's over for me, because I'm voting for National Novel Writing Month, which means I have to write 50,000 words on a novel during November.

In other words, I just won't have time for shrieking and wringing hands. Those are my typing hands.

Because of NaNoWriMo, most of my posts this month were pre-written and scheduled for November, including this one--as I write this it's actually October 27th. But I don't want to influence the election, so I'm not posting it until Tuesday evening.

It would be a mistake for me to make any predictions, but what the heck:

Congratulations, President Biden.

Yes, I know, the lawsuits haven't even begun yet. But I'm confident in my position. President-elect Biden has all the advantages of any Democrat candidate: The cheerleading of mainstream media, a stranglehold on big cities and their highly populated cemeteries, and a really awesome hair plug job that makes him by-gosh handsome.

Say what you want about Trump, but he should have gone for those hair transplants. And stayed off Twitter.

Biden also had the advantage of being more likeable than Hillary Clinton, which really isn't all that hard, while also attracting the women's vote with Vice-President Harris. Sure, Biden was an old white man when he got elected, but so was George Washington.

(I just checked, and Washington was 57 when he was first inaugurated. But my point stands, because back then 57 was today's 77.)

Now that he's President-elect and in charge of the Secret Service and the most powerful military in the world, I'd like to apologize for calling him dumb. Yeah, I still believe he's kind of intelligence challenged--which isn't the fault of anyone born that way, after all--but I'm really sorry I said it. It's just that after keeping track of things he said during the Obama years, it never occurred to me that he'd get so far.

Honestly, I didn't think President Trump would get that far, either: Four years ago I predicted we'd be seeing a Clinton reelection in 2020.

But Biden did it, and that takes a lot of work, and Biden should get credit for that. I can barely make it through a whole week without two hour naps, and I'm George Washington age. President Biden will be--what--82 at the end of his first term? (Trump's not that much younger.) It's a rough job for anyone, let alone someone so old.

Maybe I should also start being nice to V.P. Harris. Just in case.