Yes, yes, I know … I was supposed to spend the weekend
promoting (i.e. pushing, and/or selling) my short story collection. Well, let
me tell you a short story: In the last week and a half my grandmother was taken
by ambulance to the hospital (she’s back home now), my mother came down with
pneumonia, Emily’s aunt was hospitalized, Emily was diagnosed with pharyngitis,
and … well, is it any wonder that I started suffering abdominal pain? Ulcer,
here I come.
Except that after all the blood draws, x-rays, and other
tests I’d just as soon not mention, I didn’t have an ulcer. Lower left quadrant
pain, for you armchair doctors. Care to guess? No fair looking it up on the
internet …
Right – diverticulitis. Very good. It has to do with the
large intestine, and it’s pain with a load of ick. Speaking of load, guess what
they’re going to do to confirm it and rule out other problems? Hint: I’m
approaching the age when I’m supposed to have it periodically, anyway. Another
hint: There’s more ick involved.
That’s right! My very first colonoscopy! It’s important, as
we get older, to keep our minds flexible by trying new things.
Although I suspect my mind isn’t the area where flexibility
will be a problem.
Say … I’ll bet I could get a column out of this.
Oh, I almost forgot: Give my gut something to smile about:
Go check out Storm Chaser Shorts at
or
Now I’m getting this mental imagine of my gut smiling. Ick.
They'll put you to sleep for the procedure. It's what they to do you the night before. If you don't have an ulcer yet, you will.
ReplyDeleteShelly
http://secondhandhsoesnovel.blogspot.com/
So I've heard!
DeleteI think my mother's had that condition at some point in the past.
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't be surprised -- I'm finding out it's very common, especially in older people. Also very manageable, but I'm going to miss eating nuts.
Delete